2005

Just found this in my files - my prediction (I think it appeared in Interzone) for the year 2005...

Costs at Virgin Galactic spiral out of control as the company tries to comply with HSE guidelines for interplanetary spacecraft. However, the killer blow comes from the new Equalities quango with its demand for wheelchair access and toilets for the disabled on SpaceShipTwo. Rumours that the same quango will ban zebra crossings as racially insensitive are much exaggerated, ministers say, they only intend to change the colours.

According to detractors, the 100% pass rate in A levels this year is due to social engineering and manipulation of the figures. The education minister replied, “The idea that pupils might fail these exams is old-fashioned. Everyone is equal … oink.”

Since the bombing of the Iranian nuclear facilities petrol prices have passed £1 a litre. Since their marginal electoral victory, Labour have introduced twenty new initiatives that have achieved nothing and twenty new taxes to pay for them. Meanwhile, it has come as no surprise to anyone that Tony and Cherie Blair are co-directors of ASBO™ – the new ‘street accessories’ retail outlet.