Saturday, February 23, 2008

Intelligent (snigger) Design?

I picked up on this site from Charles Stross’s blog. Some real gems here.

One of the most basic laws in the universe is the Second Law of Thermodynamics. This states that as time goes by, entropy in an environment will increase. Evolution argues differently against a law that is accepted EVERYWHERE BY EVERYONE. Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it.

I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don't think he's ready to date yet. What's worse is that he's sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!

It is not known whether God created oil when he made the earth 6000 years ago, or whether oil and coal deposits were generated during Noah's flood 4000 years ago. It does not mattter. What does matter is if you don't believe that God created the earth 6000 years ago, you are going to Hell.

Masturbation can sometimes be wrong and it can sometimes not. If you masturbate thinking about how pretty the flowers are and how you want a puppy, essentially that's not wrong. But most times, that is not the case. I believe that when one masturbates a high percentage of the time they are fantasizing about a sexual partner therefore making masturbation lust. Lust, as the Bible states, is a sin. But masturbation is something that people in general should stay away from because it's hard not to lust whilst doing it.

9 comments:

Mark Chitty said...

I've seen this before and spent hours reading. I know people believe things like this in the world today, but how really is beyond me how.

Anyway, a pick of mine:

[When asked to prove the existence of a soul, in order to validate his claim that life begins at conception]

I don't have to "prove" anything.

You see, I have this wonderful thing called "faith" and with that I have no need of proof.

dave hutchinson said...

The design's fine; there just seem to be a lot of manufacturing errors...

Rykin said...

wow. It really does never cease to amaze me. I really love the "Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb" comment. It shows just what sort of mentality spouts this type of gibberish. I would laugh if it wasnt such a scary thing.

Rykin said...

"I often debate with evolutionists because I believe that they are narrow mindedly and dogmatically accepting evolution without questioning it. I don't really care how God did what He did. I know He did it." I just have to add this is my second favourite comment...

Kirby Uber said...

so you think if no one believed in any religion there would be no wars or fighting? i think it would be worse. i know if i didn't fear god's judgement i would have killed many many times.

ahahahhaha

Neal Asher said...

As someone noted on the Stross blog, the thermodynamics one seems more likely to be something put together as a piss-take. But so many of the others are obviously the product of those with an invisible friend. The one Kirby picks out ... what can I say? These psychos need a God to keep them on the straight and narrow. Scary.

There's much much more of this stuff to find on the Normal Bob Smith link down at the bottom right. Hilarious.

Lord Soth said...

Hmm one of the comments I noticed..

Occam's Razor disagrees.\n\nEDIT: Wow, I created a new award, and I wasn't even trying!

now is there any link or is it just a freak co-incidence?

Olaf said...

If God did exist I think he'd quit when he found out his devotees were wanking off thinking of garden plants rather than women.

Kirby Uber said...

If God did exist I think he'd quit when he found out his devotees were wanking off thinking of garden plants rather than women.

ahaha.

"wait wait, they are wanking to plants?! that's fucking it. i mean it. i'm out."

God Quits